I suppose everyone has their secrets. I definitely have mine.
Although, I'd have to tell you that I never looked at it that way, until one of our daughters mentioned it. Actually, she said she "caught" me. She noticed I did certain things that seemed to make a difference. Ways of diffusing tension. Small steps toward loving him. Habits that helped with the happiness of our marriage.
So, yes, I guess I do have my "secrets" and they're really rather simple ones. Nothing big or brilliant, but I'll share them in case you find that they make a difference in your marriage too.
1. Smile Warmly First Thing in the Morning
Okay, so I'm not exactly a morning person. You could say I'm more of a grumpy, where's-my-coffee, kind of person. But I have determined to greet him with the warmest, most loving smile I can muster. Boy! Does this set a wonderful tone for the day.
2. Do More Kissing than Complaining
This was the one I was "caught" doing. My husband had done something rather irritating. Downright irksome. And my daughter was watching it all from across the room. Rather than reacting, I laughed and planted a big, juicy one on his lips. Hah! That'll teach him.
3. Take Timing into Consideration
So my tendency is to blurt out what I'm feeling ... when I'm feeling it. But I'm learning to hold back until I can communicate what I have to say in a calm manner and when he's in a better place to hear me out. It's so worth waiting for the right moment.
4. Make Your Bedroom a Beautiful Place
I like turning our room into a lovely oasis for us both. To make sure it's a clean, warm, and inviting place – somewhere that he knows he can find order and peace. Somewhere special that he wants to be with me.