Dangerous, destructive behavior in marriage is frequently treated with "kid gloves." Too often it's not taken seriously until it's too late. Where do you stand? Have you gotten comfortable with certain behaviors in your marriage that used to be called "sin"? Question: Could you stand up in a room and say, without embarrassment, "We're not perfect but even so, I encourage you to follow our example in marriage?" Are you modeling the marriage you desire your children (who are watching you and taking notes) to enjoy when they get married?
A godly couple can say this, in part, because of what's missing from their marriage. Sometimes it's good when certain things go missing.
Here are 10 that have no place in a godly relationship:
1. A Sharp Tongue
So much damage in so little time ... that's the result of the unbridled tongue. It can be easy to cut with words when things don’t go our way but, in a godly marriage, neither spouse yields to this ungodly impulse. (James 3:8)
2. A Good Memory (When it Comes to Offenses)
A good memory can be very bad. After we repent of our sins before God, He doesn't then commit them to memory so they can be thrown in our faces the next time we need to repent. The Bible says that God forgets our sins. When we repent and ask forgiveness of each other, that sin should never be referenced again. Remembering and repeating past wrongs will prevent the true fellowship that always follows true forgiveness. We are called to forgive as God has forgiven. (Col. 3:13)
3. A Neglect of the Biblical Order in Marriage
In today's culture, it's practically hate speech by now but if you desire to have a marriage ordered according to God’s structure and standards, read and live by Ephesians chapter 5. The perspective of the culture we're surrounded by – the "world" the Bible calls it – is that biblical teaching on the subject of order in marriage is old, outdated ... even inappropriate, for our modern era. But God disagrees and though some things may be hard to understand, going against the culture as they do, God would have us remember, "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts" (Isaiah 55:9).