I have a confession to make. As a single, I didn't prepare well for marriage. The truth is, I didn't really prepare at all ... that is, not until I started dating my now-husband, Ted. It was then that the possibility of matrimony became a reality and I suddenly recognized the need to ready myself for it.
I wish I would have started sooner.
Because preparation takes time. And while no duration of it would have made me the perfect bride, there were things I could've addressed as a single that may have helped me enter marriage as a more thoughtful, easier-to-live-with spouse. The same is true for you.
There are things you can do now as a single to better ready yourself to begin the spousal journey in good shape. So whether the title of "spouse" is in your near future or years away, here are five things you can do to prepare for it.
1. Evaluate your habits.
When Ted and I were newlyweds, there was a particular habit of his that stood out to me ... in a good way. He never left the toilet seat up. He defied all of the stereotypical stories of men and bathrooms I'd come to believe were true over the years.
This behavior of his wasn't something he was taught as a kid, though. Instead, he adopted it in his adult years as he hosted single events at his condo. It was one way he made an effort to be courteous to his female friends. Years later, when we got married, this habit he'd embraced when he was single became a way to show kindness to me, his new wife.
Just like Ted evaluated his toilet seat routine and made a change before marriage, you can do the same with regard to your daily habits. Do you have patterns of behavior that may prove annoying, thoughtless or hurtful to a future spouse? These habits may be related to personal hygiene such as where you leave your dirty laundry, or could pertain to poor time or money management.
If you're not sure whether a habit may need addressed, ask those closest to you for honest feedback. Choose people who know you and your behaviors well. This may include parents, siblings, roommates, or friends you’ve known for several years. Allow them to be candid without fear that you'll be offended by their observations.