After 15 years of marriage, we've learned that there are definitely some things you should never say to your spouse. While there will be times that you don't see eye-to-eye on things, what you say to one another in those moments should be thought out with care. Why? Because words can sting and drive a wedge of division between you and your spouse. While working through such spats isn’t any fun, we work hard as a couple to remember the long term effects of our words. Here are 8 things you should never say to your spouse.
1. "I want a divorce."
This is the top thing never to say to your spouse. There is a heavy meaning behind it and the results, given the circumstances, could be devastating to your marriage. When things are really tough, we are often guilty of saying things that are hurtful. This one tops the list as it is your way of telling your spouse that you’re done trying and you are giving up on him/her and the union that you vowed to share. These are not words to throw around nor threaten with. Unless you have biblical grounds for divorce, keep these words away from your lips and the ears of your spouse!
2. "I'm sorry, but..."
When things get heated, we often say that we're sorry for the way that we're acting. It's important that you stop right there. Don’t try to justify your words or actions. By adding a "but" to your apology, you are simply saying that you feel that you acted correctly. It won't help to diffuse your argument ... it will only add more fuel to the burning embers.
3. "I'm disgusted by you."
As we work through marriage together we are a constant work in progress. We're exploring uncharted territory and, even now, are learning how to make it work. We both work each and every day to make one another happy. If you express disappointment or disgust in your spouse, you're saying that he/she isn't making you happy no matter how hard they’re working on it. It never feels good to hear that someone is disgusted by you, ever. Especially when you actually care what that person thinks.