How can you know if someone is your friend? This is a crucial life skill that you and your children must master. Failure to discern who is a genuine friend leads to being manipulated and used. This may result in bitterness and a crippling inability to trust others. God has provided tools in Scripture so that you can recognize genuine friendship. Becoming intimately familiar with passages that teach what friendship in action looks like is a way to start. I Corinthians 13:4-7 is such a passage. Another place to look is in the Proverbs.
Most Proverbs should not be read as commands but as reliable observations about life. For example look at Proverbs 12:18:
"The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."
These words provide insight about how to distinguish between the wise and the reckless. The reckless or rash person's words hurt and bring pain. They cut deeply. So when you see someone who claims virtue for speaking his mind and is yet insensitive, you can know this is not a person to be trusted. In contrast, the words of the wise bring healing, even if they hurt. The words of the wise are well thought out. The words of a wise person do more than blurt out the obvious.They bring healing and comfort. The wise person will be a good friend.